Idle Thoughts

Actually got to write today. For real!! So, I made tons of progress on the next Vows chapter and am now fairly certain I’ll get it posted this week. :D

Anonymous said: Just about your anon answer about how Hoster and Brynden found out about Jon Snow; it says in the books that she had Robb at Riverrun and that Ned brought Jon to Riverrun and then they all went to Winterfell for the first time. So they would have known because they would have been there.

Well, I certainly don’t recall every detail from all the books, Anon, but I definitely don’t remember reading anything about Ned bringing Jon to Riverrun. I can’t even imagine the guilt-ridden, duty bound, honorable Eddard Stark even considering bringing his bastard child to his wife’s family home.

My contention that Catelyn first discovered Jon at Winterfell is based on her second POV chapter in A Game of Thrones. During the discussion of what to do with Jon when Ned goes to King’s Landing, she recalls finding out about the bastard. That passage includes tis sentence. “When the wars were over at last, and Catelyn rode to Winterfell, Jon and his wet nurse had already taken up residence.” So, unless Hoster visited Winterfell at some point over the years it’s possible he NEVER saw Jon.

If you do know a specific book reference about Ned taking Jon to Winterfell which proves my assumption wrong, please share it with me. I’m always willing to learn new things about these books.

Anonymous said: Do you have any head canons for how Hooster (and/or the Blackfish) found out about Jon Snow? Because I can't imagine that Catelyn would've told him/them.

Do you mean in canon? As in how Hoster and Brynden Tully would have learned Ned Stark brought a bastard home from war?

Well, I honestly believe Catelyn WOULD have told them. She might not have wanted to. She’d be humiliated, disappointed, an angry. As hard as she tends to be on herself, she might even fear they’d view Ned’s raising Jon at Winterfell as a failure on her part somehow. I don’t think she’d fear their reactions to Ned actually HAVING a bastard. She herself wasn’t overly upset about that. It was kind of expected that a man separated from his wife (whom barely knew in the first place) for an entire year would likely have sex with SOMEBODY during all that time. And sex has been known to cause babies.

No, the problem was that Ned brought him home, named him son, and set about raising him with his trueborn son and subsequent other trueborn children. Jon was no secret. Ned’s decision was to acknowledge and raise him personally was no secret. The very thing about Jon that made him problematic for Cat and might have made her hesitant to tell her family about his existence also made it IMPOSSIBLE for her to think they wouldn’t hear about him. Westeros may not have had internet, but they had ravens, and travelers, and gossip aplenty. 

Catelyn may have been young and hurt and angry, but she has always been portrayed as being intelligent and eminently practical and pragmatic. If word of Ned’s bastard in Winterfell would inevitably reach Riverrun, she would want to be the one to send it. She’d want her father to hear her words before someone else’s and to know that his daughter would handle the situation in a way that would make him proud. Family is very important to Catelyn, and she’d want hers to know that whatever had occurred, she had every intention of being every inch the Lady of Winterfell and raising Hoster’s grandson to be its Lord.

On a more personal and emotional level, I think she’d also be desperate to have some connection with people who would be as angry and upset on her behalf as she was herself, and there was NO ONE like that for her in Winterfell. She was YOUNG and basically alone, and even if the thought of her father knowing how she’d been shamed mortified her, the thought of his justified anger at Ned for treating her so poorly would have given her some measure of comfort, some reminder that she was valued greatly by the family she’d had to leave behind at least.

So, in the end, I do think Catelyn herself sent word to Riverrun about Jon Snow’s presence in Winterfell. Her hand likely shook as she penned that letter, and it was probably the most difficult letter she ever had to write, but even if a part of her just wished that no one from home ever had to hear of the boy, she knew that couldn’t be. So, for the reasons above, she sent a letter to Hoster Tully. How long it took her to do that, and whether or not her father had heard from someone else beforehand, I can’t say. But he did hear it from her.

Getting sleepy …Trying to stay awake for my husband to come home. Poor guy got held up by bad weather up north and is driving the almost two hours home from the airport much later than I’d like when he’s already tired from flying all day. :-/

So, Son Number 3 got nominated for the ALS ice water challenge by a friend from school, and we decided to douse him after football practice tonight when he was already soaking wet, dirty, and headed for a shower. Being a Go Big or Go Home kind of kid, he insisted on ALL the ice in the freezer and the BIG bucket from down in the barn because, and I quote, “I’m not a wimp who’s gonna pour a little cup of ice water on my head.” LOL!

Well, the BIG bucket full of ice and water WEIGHED a lot, and it slipped in Son Number 2’s hands as he dumped it over his little brother, hitting Number 3 rather solidly on the head. So I now have a video on my Facebook of one of my sons very nearly killing another with a great big bucket, and compassionate mother that I am, I’m laughing my head off at it!!

metal-and-dust said: Budapest, Dublin, Prague - 3 of my favorite cities in Europe :)

Have I ever been put in the Friend Zone?  As I don’t particularly believe in such a location, I’d have to say no. I’ve certainly had crushes on guys who were not interested in me romantically, but “liked” me just fine. Vice versa, I’ve had guys who totally wanted to date me, but I just wasn’t attracted to them that way—nothing against them (well, okay, some WERE creeps, but most were perfectly nice, normal guys who just didn’t appeal to me romantically even though I like them just fine.) How does NOT BEING ATTRACTED to someone cause you to put them into some specific locale or zone? It just means those guys didn’t want to date me didn’t, just like I didn’t date guys I didn’t want to date. And yeah, it kinda sucked to be the one who was disappointed, but we all lived. :D

Have I ever drunk to forget something and/or someone? Yeah. Not proud of it, but yeah, a couple times in college and grad school. Always “something”—like a particular event. Never drank to forget a guy. Then one last time when I was WAY old enough to know better—When I realized my father’s Alzheimer’s had progressed to the point that he really didn’t know me most of the time, I got probably the drunkest I’ve ever been in my life. And I was a crying, depressed drunk!! Thank God my husband loves me because he took very good care of me, and that had to be one rotten job!

Already did Prague. :)

Anonymous said: LOL reading your reply about your husband being all "back off dude" and I'm like yeah I bet that works seeing as he's about 6'1000000" or something

For the record, my husband is just a bit over 6’2”. (and he thinks he’s kind of short, LOL. Comes from having a lot of REALLY tall friends in school.) And he’s generally a very laid back peaceful kind of guy who mostly lets things roll off him. He will come to the defense of someone who’s being threatened, however, especially women. And MOST especially, me.  

I like that you didn’t make some big NO OF COURSE NOT denial. My roommate freshman year and I were thought to be dating by a few people. I don’t think we ever corrected their assumption. (She’s straight and I’m not, but it wouldn’t matter either way.)

Well, at first I admit that we just thought it was WAY TOO FUNNY to even respond to—we were too busy laughing about it to deny it. I mean, an embarrassingly large number of our private conversations were spent CRYING ABOUT GUYS to each other! But then it started to bug me that friends—good friends—seemed really disturbed about the whole thing, like this was some vile slander that had to be crushed immediately. I didn’t understand that because neither of us was offended or distraught over it or anything. What was the big deal? My best friend is a beautiful person, inside and out. In spite of being straight, I’d be far more offended if people had wondered if I was dating some of the really horrible guys around, LOL! Instead, I was being given credit for good taste :D

So, letting certain people just wonder and worry about things that really weren’t anybody’s business seemed the most entertaining and potentially enlightening course of action. :) 

vivacephoenix said: Because I know you're a musician, Vienna! :)

Ugh! This one’s hard!!

Choose a song to define my life and explain it. Really? My whole life?  I cant think of a hundred songs that touch on some aspect of my life, but one song for the whole thing? Hmm.

Off the top of my head, I’m gonna say “I Hope You Dance,” which is a country song by Lee Ann Womack, just because the lyrics to that song pretty much sum up the way I try to approach life (even if I don’t always succeed at it), and it certainly expresses the attitude toward life I’m trying to instill in my kids—especially as I watch them grow up which inevitably means they’ll be dancing away from me and into their own song. Which is, of course, precisely what they should do. And I can’t love dancing to my own song and love them if I’m not willing to not only let them go do that, but excited about encouraging them to do that.

ouatlawqueen said: Prague and Belgrade

Am I a jealous person?  Less so, all the time. I think it’s rather natural to be jealous or envious of what others have when you are very young—look at toddlers—they just grab whatever they want that’s in anyone else’s hands, LOL! As we get older, we hopefully learn to see the other person is as important as we are. Anyway, as a teen and in my twenties, I tended to be a more competitive person than I am now, and I was sometimes guilty of envying someone’s success or good fortune more than truly being happy for them. Now, while I certainly may look at something someone else has attained or achieved and think “Wow, I’d like that,” my desire for it doesn’t keep me from being honestly happy for the person who has it. Life’s too short to envy people. Everybody could use more happiness. 

As for the romantic sort of jealousy, I used to suffer from that on occasion as well (especially toward a specific ex-girlfriend of my husband’s whom EVERYBODY was so anxious to tell me all about when we first started dating), but we’ve been together so long now, I honestly don’t get jealous at all any more and neither does he (although he does get sort of possessive and “back off dude” when men are rude and hit on me which is kind of cute, actually). We just both know that whatever else we may be, I’m his and he’s mine, so jealousy is really sort of silly. :D

What nicknames have I been given? Not a lot, really. I get called by the first syllable of my first name pretty often. I had one grandfather always call me Tabitha after a little girl on an old TV show he liked called “Bewitched.” He’d wiggle my nose with his finger when I was really little little because that’s how the little girl did witchcraft. The other grandfather called me Twinkle Toes because I was a dancer for a long time and then Belle after Beauty and the Beast came out because I always had my nose in a book. My husband calls me a few different things—honey, babe, sweetheart, and a couple of things I’m not typing on here. Mostly, I’ve always just been called by my name—and by my extended family that means first and middle names—it’s a southern thing! :)